


Five Ways Goku Centers Sanzo

by theskywasblue



Series: Five Things [1]
Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Drabbles, M/M, Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-07
Updated: 2010-07-07
Packaged: 2017-10-10 10:38:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/98834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theskywasblue/pseuds/theskywasblue





	Five Ways Goku Centers Sanzo

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Rroselavy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rroselavy/gifts).



It’s not much rain – just a few drops, enough the turn the ground outside Sanzo’s window the dark copper color of old blood. Smoke curls perceptibly from his lips, like the steady breath of a trapped dragon and the smell of tobacco and tar blocks out the clear rain smell. It makes Goku’s nose burn, and his eyes itch – but although he’s only known Sanzo a few months, he knows better than to complain. Rain is Sanzo’s Bad Thing, like snow was for Goku not long ago. But as long as he sits with his back just barely against Sanzo’s leg, Sanzo’s eyes stay quiet and the shadows behind them aren’t as dark.

***

Sanzo wants to be angry. He is actually. Stupid monkey and his rash actions and _no one’s life is worth that – especially not mine_. But it just figures Goku would look so completely downtrodden, so completely _sorry_ that for a moment all Sanzo’s anger is as nothing. He pushes his fingers into Goku’s thick, soft hair, looks into those eyes, golden and bottomless, hears as always the remainder of that tiny, aching voice calling to him, and for a moment he can’t bring himself to care that Goku did something so idiotic. They are still here, both of them, and somehow that matters more.

***

The pillow hits Sanzo square in the face, doesn’t quite knock the wind from him, but is just enough to silence him for a moment while he thinks _I’ll kill him this time, I absolutely will – there’s no escape. _There’s a traitorous part of him that thinks Goku is probably right – that for some infuriating reason they _need_ Gojyo around – but it still pisses him off a little.

***

“I’ll shoot you,” he tells Goku.

It isn’t because he doesn’t care. It doesn’t mean that he wouldn’t do everything in his power (although does he really have any _power_ in the face of Goku? That’s an increasingly slippery slope) to stop himself from having to do it. He says it, and means it, because he knows that’s what Goku needs to hear, and being able to promise it makes Sanzo feel like he’s strong enough to take care of him for once.

***

_“I think I’d be okay.”_

He can’t get those words out of his head. They even manage to overpower Ukoku’s taunts, Ukoku’s _lies_ (they have to be lies, Sanzo’s not sure how he’ll manage to get up out of bed if he allows himself to think even for an instant that they might be the truth) because Sanzo never imagined that – even if Goku would be okay – he really wouldn’t be.

-End-


End file.
